Do you ever wonder how much of what you experience as a child shapes who you become? I think about it constantly. You may not know it at the time but movies, music, books, events, perhaps the smallest encounter, might affect who you become as you get older.

I first noticed it when I bought Edward Scissorhands years ago. I watched this beloved childhood movie as an adult and thought maybe this is a part of the reason why I am who I am. There is the character of the inventor (I’m a chemist) and the mother sells Avon (I sold MaryKay for a brief time).

I know that could be ridiculous but maybe it did affect me. I’m not saying that everything you watch or listen to will make you do things. I watched any horror movie I wanted growing up and I didn’t turn into a murderous monster. I read books geared to adults in elementary school, so much that my teachers would call & ask if it was appropriate for me to be reading such items, to which my mother would reply, “If she has a book she can read it.” I’ve always loved the fact that I was able to watch & read anything. I think that being treated as an adult in certain aspects enhanced my intellect. But I digress. The point is that sometimes I wonder what affected me as a child & shaped my life.

For example, I danced from 3-18yrs old and there was a Chinese restaurant next door. The paper place settings had the Chinese zodiac that told you what animal you were based on the year you were born. I am a rat. I read it every time I went to that restaurant. One thing it said is that Rats seldom have lasting friendships.

I wonder if I got that engrained in my brain which could have affected my friendships throughout life. Because for me it is true. I do seldom have lasting friendships.

My best friend in kindergarten & first grade moved away. One of my only friends in elementary school moved away. In high school I drifted away from my friends for a guy. In college I didn’t live there so I didn’t meet many new people which resulted in no new friends.

I did live in Cannes though for a semester and made some friends there. There was one in particular who I considered to be one of my best friends. We got along well & managed to keep in touch fairly well for a long time. We would Skype each other & Facebook IM one another fairly regularly. We even saw each other every few years with either her traveling to the states or me to Europe.

We don’t talk as much and it has been about 3.5 years since we have seen each other but I still consider her to be a lasting friend. I may not have (m)any friends but I do know I can always call or message her and she will be there. If I do ever go to back to Europe or if she comes to the States I am sure we will get together.

A long time ago in one of our times together, she gave me a cookbook box set.

It contains a book with 22 salty & 22 sweet mini madeleine recipes.

It also came with two silicone molds. I have never used it…until now.

To be fair it got misplaced and then I moved countless times so it was packed up, but up north in Almost Canada, I have lots of time to bake and these will definitely be a recurring baked good in my household. They are so easy & so delicious. The recipe I made was a honey madeleine but I used half the honey and added the seeds from half of a fresh vanilla bean.

Honey-Vanilla Madeleines (adapted from Mini Madeleines & translated into english) 

•  1 cup flour
• 1/2 cup butter, softened
• 2/3 cup granulated sugar
• 2 large eggs
• 2 tbsp milk
• 2 tsp baking powder
• 1 tbsp honey
• 1/2 vanilla bean

Preheat the oven to 425F. Mix the eggs & the sugar until well blended in a medium bowl. Add the flour & baking powder & mix until combined. Mix in the softened butter and milk. Add the honey & the seeds from the half vanilla bean (reserve the bean for another use). Place in the fridge for 30 minutes. Generously grease the molds with butter. Fill them so that they are not overflowing (approx. 1/2-3/4tsp). Bake for 6-8 minutes or until golden brown & cake feels spongey to the touch. Makes about 3 dozen.

I don’t know if I will make any great friendships as the years go by. By now I have gotten used to having no girlfriends. Sometimes it does sadden me but other days I think it would just be too much work & am content with the way things are. I have always been a very solitary person with a few close friends. While almost all of those close friendships are basically non-existent except for in memory or the occasional communication, I know that if it comes down to it I do have people I can count on. These madeleines remind me of just that.